Strange habit

My love for solitude hits me from time to time..Right now, I was left alone in the company of myself in this supposed festive season. Honestly, this doesn't bother me at all. It doesn't really scare or bore me but rather it is the time that forces me to think, daydream or lay around staring at the ceiling. Though this might sound so anti-social, I think otherwise. When you work, you don't really think about your life..more on your work and what needs to be done to improve your performance. You find a way to immerse yourself in the workplace and mingle with officemates. With friends, you tend to talk about anything under the sun, gossip around with the latest news on people, their relationship, family, work etc. You can also talk about what happened in the day and how embarrassing that happened on the street. With family, you talk about business, relatives, stuff at home, siblings.

Back home, I would like to go up my favorite place in our building. It's up the roof deck where the water tanks are. I make up excuses to get up there (most of the time, I tell my mom or dad that I'll be brisk walking back and fort to keep myself fit) but I would be indulging in the company of my thoughts. If it wouldn't look so weird, I would have placed a mini lounge area at our roof desk. I love looking up in the sky and staring at the stars infinitely. I feel at peace whenever I look at the city skyline. It just felt like I'm just this small person in the vast universe that whatever that happened to me is just part of the act/play of the universe. I feel the connection to the world which sounds new age to other people. I just love to think about things...life...people..earth...vague ideas. I would be with my Ipod , listening to meaningful songs to drown out other sounds...it just feels private...the songs seem like speaking to me with secret language that can only be felt by those who understands.

This is one of my personal secrets.